by Ralph Bell
Thursday, January 31, 2008 12:57 PM EST

About three years ago, St. Cloud resident Debbie Johnson, placed a call to Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Minnesota. Her quest was to find a male mentor for Nick, her only child.

“Being a single mom,” she said, “and his dad having no interest in the mentoring part of it, I just felt bad. I felt that Nick was missing out, and I wanted him to at least have that feeling, that sense of belonging. I'd heard about the Big Brothers Big Sisters program through other people, and they were just ranting and raving about how great it is. So after meeting with them I signed up, hoping Nick could get matched with a Big Brother.”

And then the wait began. And they waited, and they waited and they waited.

“I was calling there all the time,” Debbie said, wondering what was going on. And I know there is a need - there are a lot of boys who need a Big Brother instead of just wanting one, so I totally understood that part. But after signing up and getting so excited, it really was hard to wait.”

Debbie's ace-in-the-hole, as it turned out, was her unwavering belief in a higher power.

“I'm a very spiritual person,” she said. “And sometimes it's just a matter of being patient and waiting for God to bring the right person, the right people around. But never in a million years did I think my son would be blessed with a Big Family. Nick and I both, we got a really good hand.”

The Big Family program was created to identify and match children with not just one mentor, but rather an entire family, all who have agreed to work together to provide emotional support for a child.

When Dawn Solarz of St. Joseph Township heard about the Big Family program, she was all ears.

“I used to do volunteer service and it ended,” said the wife and mother of two. “I wanted to do something else, and I thought helping children was probably the best for the community, because you can change their lives for the better, whereas it may be too late after they're adults.”

So Dawn sat down with her husband, Greg, and their two young daughters, Rachael and Elizabeth, to discuss what it would mean to be a Big Family. What would it be like, they wondered, to open their lives and hearts to another? And what could each of them do to contribute to a child's well being - to be a friend?

Jessie Layman is one of seven case managers employed by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Minnesota. During one of Debbie Johnson's calls, she mentioned the idea of a Big Family for Nick.

“Jessie wondered if I would be interested in that,” Debbie said. “And I started thinking about it and thought it would be even better, because Nick could see how a real mom-and-dad family works. How they all work together, that kind of thing.”

With Debbie's blessing, Jessie got to work on what would soon become a match made in heaven.

“We thought Nick would be a perfect match for the Solarz's,” Jessie said, “because he's an only child with a single parent who could benefit by having a Big Family. Plus, he doesn't have any sisters, they don't have a brother, and he's right in the age range of the girls.”

Debbie fondly recalls the day the two families met in April 2007.

“When we walked into that room to interview with Nick and that family, with Jessie there,” she said, “it was almost like we kind of all knew each other in some weird way. And when they asked if Nick wanted to go out for supper with them, just for an hour or so, to kind of get to know each other a little bit, Nick had no hesitation. He just looked at me and said, ‘Can I?'”

Since their trip to Culver's Restaurant, the Solarz family and Nick get together almost every Sunday afternoon for a few hours, oftentimes longer, taking in a movie, going bowling or just hanging out at their rural St. Joseph home.

“Nick lives in town and we live out in the country,” Dawn said. “So we've gone hiking out back in our woods, what we like to call exploring. And he has fun in the house, playing with the girls. I think Nick has brought a lot to our lives and to my daughter's lives. They treat him like an actual brother. And it's just fun having a little boy around, too.”

The Solarz's are the first Big Family in Central Minnesota. Still, Greg said the only regret he has is not getting involved with the organization sooner.

“It's such a rewarding program it's hard to believe you can take part in it,” he said. “I almost feel guilty doing it.”

When asked if they would recommend the program, each of the other participants interviewed had this to say:

“I just feel so grateful,” Nick's mother, Debbie, said, “there are people who want to open up their lives and families and homes and their hearts to a child. Think about the rewards it gives a person, that you are being a part of a child's life, in a way that no one else probably can.”

“We're better people for having him,” Dawn said. “The girls have relationships with a brother-type role model, and they're also a part of volunteering in the community. Nick is a good kid, and we're happy to be part of his life and have him as part of ours.”

(Nick's) funny, and nice, and cool to play with,” said 8-year-old Rachael Solarz. “We like to build forts in the snow, and sometimes inside we play hide and seek. I think Big Family's are good. It's quite fun doing it.”

“People probably should become a Big Family,” said 9-year-old Elizabeth Solarz. “I've experienced it and it's really fun. Plus when me and my sister start fighting, he'll try and solve it.”

“You're not out there to save the world,” Jessie said. “It's just to be a friend, to let a child feel special, that they can do good in this world and reach for the stars.

“We don't want to scare off our volunteers by putting a big responsibility on their shoulders, she added. “Just be a friend and things will fall into place naturally, without you even realizing it.”

“Go ahead and do it,” said 8-year-old Nick. “You have somebody out there who needs you.”

Big Brothers Big Sisters of Central Minnesota is one of 471 affiliate agencies located in all states, Guam, Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands. This agency serving children in Stearns, Benton, Sherburne and Morrison counties has been recognized by Big Brothers Big Sisters of America as one of the organization's top three agencies for two years in a row.

To learn more about the organization, or to apply to become a Big Brother, Big Sister, Big Couple or Big Family, visit www.bbbscentralmn.org or call 253-1616.